Getting Parents To Accept Help

Getting your Parents to Accept Help

The idea of accepting help around the house and especially for personal care is not an easy decision for any senior. It often represents a loss of independence for them and the idea that they can’t do as much as they used to can be an overwhelming and depressing feeling.

For those seniors that are resisting help, it is important for family members to be respectful of this, and while it is important that proper care is put in place, it should be done so in a manner that helps them ease into this major lifestyle change.

    Change can be difficult for many seniors.
    Be patient and keep the following suggestions in mind:

    • Introduce the idea slowly. Give her time to accept the idea.
    • Offer a trial period. She may be willing to try a Support Worker for a limited time, especially if she knows she can change her mind later.
    • Sometimes parents are more willing to accept Support Worker help if it is presented as being for the family caregiver’s benefit.
    • Start the Support Worker with household chores, NOT personal or “hands on” care.
    • Slowly introduce these other tasks as familiarity grows.
    • Help your parent visit a few nursing homes to review their options. Most seniors prefer to stay in their home and may be willing to accept the help required to stay there.
    • Often people will listen to their doctor. Ask her doctor to suggest a plan that includes a Support Worker.
    • Often, the person may be concerned about the cost of services. Remember that most of today’s seniors grew up in the Depression and World War years. Money is always on their mind.

    The Affinity Health Approach:

    For more than 20 years we have dealt with the resistance to accept help. Most of our services are initiated by family members, often the adult children of our clients. Their biggest challenge and concern is that mom or dad won’t accept any help in their home, even though they clearly need it.

    Affinity Health always starts with a free, no-obligation nurse consultation. During this consultation with our nurse, we will have a guided one-on-one conversation with your loved one to help understand their concerns, fears and resistance to help. By helping them understand that our services will maintain their independence, and not take it away, and by always ensuring they are in charge, we can often break down these barriers.

    Our nurses are trained in dealing with these situations and, although the conversation is never easy, we can often help our clients feel more comfortable with the idea of accepting help.

    In these situations we always suggest starting services slowly and ensuring that we gather feedback and input from our client to ensure they feel part of the decision process.